<!DOCTYPE html>
<html>
<head>
<meta charset="UTF-8">
<title>Hardest To Love by authoramluciano</title>
<style type="text/css">

body { background-color: #ffffff; }
.CI {
text-align:center;
margin-top:0px;
margin-bottom:0px;
padding:0px;
}
.center   {text-align: center;}
.cover    {text-align: center;}
.full     {width: 100%; }
.quarter  {width: 25%; }
.smcap    {font-variant: small-caps;}
.u        {text-decoration: underline;}
.bold     {font-weight: bold;}
</style>
</head>
<body>
<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/26167357">Hardest To Love</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/authoramluciano/pseuds/authoramluciano'>authoramluciano</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>John Wick (Movies)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>F/M, Movie: John Wick: Chapter 3, Post-John Wick: Chapter 3 - Parabellum (2019)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-08-29</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-09-02</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-06 03:07:30</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Mature</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>4</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>6,983</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/26167357</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/authoramluciano/pseuds/authoramluciano</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Emilia has been with John Wick for three years, married for one year. When one night he comes home bloody, saying he got mobbed outside the store and not to worry…<br/>Until the next night, people break into there home-That’s when John shows her the safe room, she didn’t know about, as well as the arsenal of guns.<br/>Against his warning, she watches the security camera’s and see’s her husband killing everyone effortlessly.<br/>Who is this man? Who did she marry?</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Administrator &amp; John Wick, John Wick &amp; John Wick's Unnamed Dog, John Wick &amp; Winston, John Wick/You, Marcus &amp; John Wick, The Director &amp; John Wick</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>8</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>24</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. When I Look At You</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>I have been sick all day.  The doctor said that I had the flu and that I needed to rest as much as possible. John has been wonderful, taking care of you, even with his busy work schedule. You are getting out of the much needed shower when you hear the front door opening, making Dog bark. I really wanted to change his name, but John seemed very content with his name being Dog.</p><p>“Calm.” You hear John’s deep voice, making Dog whimper.</p><p>“Honey?” You call out, drying your hair as much as possible with a towel. But he doesn’t answer, “John?” I call out again, peeking outside the bathroom. That’s when I see John, I gasp at the sight of him.</p><p>“I’m okay, Emma.” John’s voice fills the hallway.</p><p>“You’re bleeding. What- what happened?” I ask, seeing John all bloody. “We- we need to call the-“</p><p>“Hey, hey.” John reaches out to my face, grabbing my cheek. “I’m okay, I- I got mobbed.”</p><p>“You- you got mobbed?” I ask, shaking my head. “John- we need to call the police an-and.”</p><p>“No-“</p><p>“What do you mean, no? John you-“</p><p>“Emilia.” John gives me a warning tone, calling me by my full name. I watch as he takes off his suit and he goes into the shower. I stand there, arms crossed, in the open door waiting for him to explain to me on why we aren’t talking to the police. When he exits the shower, he wraps a towel around his waist and looks at me. I see the cuts and bruises forming on his face and upper body, making me frown.</p><p>“John-“</p><p>“Em, I’m okay.” John closes the space between us, grabbing my face. He inches my face up so I am looking at him. He knows this is a weakness of mine… “I already talked to the police before I left the gas station. They will be calling me tomorrow with more information. Okay?” John bends himself down slightly so his face is in front of mine. I nod my head, smiling softly. This makes him grin, kissing me on my forehead.</p><p>John let’s me go, telling me that I should lay back down. Apparently my fever is coming back and it’s almost time for me to take more medicine. I go back into our room, Dog following me. It is going to take him some time to get dressed, so I decide to rub some lotion on my legs and arms. Dog is laying in front of the closet, laying in his bed. When I am finished with the lotion, I place the bottle onto the dresser, feeling John’s presence in the doorway.</p><p>“I thought I told you to lay down.” John’s deep voice, sends shivers though my body. I turn around to face him. He is still in a towel, but the cuts on his face are cleaned and have a nice coat of antibiotic on them. I reach out putting my hand on his cheek. I examine the cuts and I can’t stop myself from frowning. But before John can say anything, I give him a fake smile and get into bed.</p><p>I am not too happy, but if he says he is okay… then he is okay. But I can’t help but feel like something isn’t right.</p><p>I get comfortable in bed, pulling the covers close to me and John places the tray on my lap. As I start eating, I watch John get dressed in a pair of sweats and a white shirt. I eat the all of the soup and to make John happy I drink the broth as well. Once I am full and truly can’t have anymore, John hands me my medicine and I take them happily. I want to get over this illness as soon as possible.</p><p>“I will be right back.” John kisses the top of my head, taking the tray back into the kitchen. When he returns I watch him as he checks the lock on the windows, looking outside for a while and then closes the blinds.</p><p>Dog jumps onto the bed, laying down at my feet and whines. This makes John pat him on his head and close the bedroom door. Then he does something I have never seen him do, lock the bedroom door.</p><p>“John?” I sit up completely, he turns around to look at me. John walks over to the bed, sitting down and pulls me to him. I rest my head on his chest, exhaling. I don’t remember falling asleep but when I wake up, John is not in bed as usual. He always wakes up before me, through the years that I have known him.</p><p>John is a light sleeper, but a very passionate lover. He is a protector, but he cares strongly about things he cares most about. Overall, he is a very unique man who can be quite intense.</p><p>I hear him clanking a few dishes downstairs, and breathe in the wonderful smell of breakfast food. This makes my stomach growl and gets me out of bed. When I head downstairs, I see his shoulders tense before he even see’s me.</p><p>“Didn’t the doctor say to rest?” John speaks, turning around and putting the eggs on the plate next to the bacon and pancakes. I nod my head, smiling and walk over to him. I wrap my arms around him, my head on his back and I kiss his shoulder. When he turns around, he kisses me on the top of my head. When he let’s me go, he signals for me to sit down.</p><p>But little did I know that the wonderful morning with my husband was going to be the last...</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. No Time To Die</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Emilia is about to see her husband John Wick in action for the first time...</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>I am getting out of the shower, dressing in my nightgown and robe when John get’s home from work. Dog barks, making me peek my head out of the door. John is dressed in his signature all black suit, coming up the stairs. He stops at the end of the stairs, looking at me and taking me in. I give him a soft smile, happy to see him after eight hours of not seeing him.</p><p>John takes a few more steps, closing the space between us. He reaches his hand out to my throat, pulling me closer to him and kisses me on my lips.</p><p>“I love you.” I say the second he releases me. John kisses my lips a few more times, then kisses my nose.</p><p>“I love you too.” John smiles, releasing me and walks into the bedroom. I hear his bedside table open and close. I know he keeps a gun in there, for protection. Did he put the gun back into the drawer?</p><p>Before I can say anything, I hear Dog whine then start barking loudly. I exit the bathroom, as Dog runs down the stairs. John comes to my side, then within seconds there is a loud crash from downstairs.</p><p>I go to scream, but John’s large hand covers my mouth. John wraps his other arm around me and pulls me up off the floor. I hear more loud crashes downstairs with Dog barking and growling.</p><p>“Emilia! I need you to listen to me!” John let’s go of my mouth, putting both of his hands on my face. “You need to do exactly what I say, do you understand?” I nod my head, following John. I scrunch my eyebrows, as he opens the closet, and see him move a board away from the wall. A door?</p><p>I hear the loud banging continuing downstairs, then more glass breaking. This makes me jump closer to John. Then he opens the door, pulling me inside. A safe room? There is a whole other room in our closet… Dog runs in behind us, jumping on the couch. John closes the heavy door behind us, and grabs my upper arm.</p><p>“Sit down.” John says, and I do exactly what he says. I sit on the sofa and watch as he presses a few buttons on the wall. A second passes and a bunch of paintings move exposing a whole arsenal. The walls are covered in different style of guns and ammo. I sit all the way back and let out a deep breathe I was holding in. John look back and forth from me to the guns he is loading. I feel like I am in a movie… Is this some bad dream? Maybe- maybe I took too many pills.</p><p>“John-“ I whisper, but a loud crash pulls both of our attention. John holds up his hand, signalling for me to be quiet. Dog goes to bark, but John points at him. John walks up to me with a gun in his waist and two guns in his hands. I feel the tears falling down my face, but John brings his face close to mine.</p><p>“Emilia, I need you to stay in here with Dog and don’t leave until I come back. You will not leave this room until I say so. Do you understand me?” John says, and waits for me to nod my head. John stands up straight and walks to the door. “Don’t turn on this TV-“ John points at the TV next to the sofa. “I love you.” He gives me the quickest, softest smile.</p><p>“I love you.” I say through shaking breaths as he opens the door, speaking out then gives me one last look before he closes it. I hear the heavy lock as he locks me inside. Not even a minute past when I hear gunfire… I gasp, putting my hands over my ears as the sound starts filling outside the safe room I am in. Then- silence.</p><p>Not even five minutes later I hear crashes, glass breaking, things breaking, then more gunfire. I go against John’s advice, and turn on the TV. I need to see what’s going on… But when the screen turn on, I see different parts of the house fill the screen. There is so many people in the house, wearing all black and holding huge guns… Then- I see John. I can’t take my eyes off of him, then- I watch the man I fell in love with, the man I love… the man I married kill a man. I cover my mouth as a horrible sound leaves my mouth. I hear Dog whine, but my own heart rate is filling in my ears. Tears are falling down my face at the same rate John is killing these people.</p><p>But what scares me the most is that I don’t even see him hesitate, or flinch. He kills them so swiftly, almost elegantly… It’s like he was dancing…</p><p>I watched as the biggest man and John struggle for a second, and John pulls out a knife from somewhere and stabs this man in the neck, stomp on his foot, then shoot him twice in the chest and once in the head. Dead…</p><p>John tosses the now empty gun at another person’s head, knocking him down to the floor, then pulls out the gun in his waist shooting him. More people come at him, but he shoots them on sight, two in the chest then possibly another one or two in the head.</p><p>I can barely breathe, watching as he kills every. Single. Person. All I could do was count the shots being fired by John…</p><p>1, 2, 3, 4… 17, 18, 19… Fills the gun- 28, 29, 30… Fills the gun- 35, 36, 37…</p><p>	I find myself loosing count after 62, mostly because I started feeling lightheaded and sick to my stomach. I don’t think they got one single bullet into John… Then I feel my legs going weak, making me take a step closer to the TV.</p><p>	“Baba yaga!” A man yells, then I watch John disappear for a second, then reappear just to grab the guy who shouted, slamming his head against the wall stabs him in the stomach. He punches him in the neck, puts the same hand that he… I feel bile rising in my throat as he covers the man’s mouth and- and stabs him in the neck. I watch as John inches himself down to make complete eye contact with the man and lowers himself with the dying man. John doesn’t remove his hand from the man’s mouth until he is sure he is dead. Then just removes the knife from the mans neck to continue killing.</p><p>	I now know that John is out of bullets- What is he- He jumps onto a guy, completely disarming him and throws him over his head onto the ground. When they get back to there feet, the man kicks John onto the floor. When he gets back to his feet, the man kicks him again, but John manages to land a few punches on the man and get’s him over his shoulders and… and throws him through the glass window. John reaches down, grabs the gun on the floor and shoots him.</p><p>	Then, in slow motion… John get’s shot in the back. I get even closer to the TV, feeling my breathing stop completely. John doesn’t move for a second, then, like I was watching a movie he shoots the last guy in the stomach. The guys falls to the floor, grabbing his stomach and tries scooting away from John. John stands up, walks up to him without loosing eye contact and shoots him in the head.</p><p>	I see John’s body relax slightly, his shoulders falling. Then I see police lights in filling the screens, when I look at the upper screen. I see one single police car.</p><p>	“Finally.” I let out a breath, but when I watch John he puts the gun behind the back and answers the door. I could barely hear what they said, but I overheard the cops say-</p><p>	“You working again?” The cops asks, taking off his hat as he looks into our house.</p><p>	“No. I’m just sorting some stuff out.” John answers, and the cop nods his head.</p><p>	“Oh well, I’ll leave you be then. Goodnight, John.” The cop starts walking away.</p><p>	“Goodnight, Jimmy.” John says, closing the door.</p><p>        Did the cop really just leave? Working again? What does that mean? I- I don’t understand.</p><p>	John walks up the stairs, and I take a step away from the TV hearing John opening the door to the safe room. When he opens it up, he see’s me then see’s that the TV is on. When he takes a step in, I take a step back. John breathes, closing the door and locks it. I watch him as he walks over to the wall and pulls out an old phone. He sits down and dials a number.</p><p>	“This is Wick. I would like to make a dinner reservation for 12.” Then he hangs up the phone. He opens up a drawer and I see a bunch of gold coins… He pulls out a few of them, counts them quickly and stands up.</p><p>	John walks up to me, but every step he made… I took steps back until I fell onto the couch. Before I could do anything, John grabs my upper arm and pulls me to my feet. I wanted to fight, but I couldn’t. I was so petrified that I couldn’t do anything but what he wanted. John takes the same hands that I just saw him kill with, that literally has blood on them, and put them on my neck. I feel John sigh, and kiss me on the top of my head.</p><p>	I don’t know how long he kept me like this, but when he let’s me go he tries to catch my eyes but I look away from him. I can’t look at him right now… I don’t think I can ever look at him the same after this-</p><p>	“Come.” John’s deep voice startles me, as he grabs my upper arm and pulls me to the door. When he opens it, I try to pull my arm away from him, but he tightens his grip. John pulls me outside of the room, Dog following us and he makes me follow him downstairs. When I see all the bodies, I can’t help but feel nauseous. But I physically can’t do anything-</p><p>	I haven’t cried, screamed, or even spoken a word since John opened that door. John takes me to the hallway near the front door, where there isn’t any bodies, and stops at the chair a few feet away from the front door.</p><p>	“Sit.” John speaks, and both me and Dog sit down. Dog sits on top of my feet and I don’t take my eyes off John. I refuse to look at him in the eye, so I focus on his tie. Still perfect and neat as I tied it this morning. He stands right across from me, looking at me like he is expecting me to do something. But I don’t move an inch. I sit here, staring at his perfect fucking tie.</p><p>	Dog whines, which signals John to open the front door. There are a bunch men, dressed in all black… The older man takes off his hat and gives John a soft smile.</p><p>	“Good to see you, John.” The older man speaks.</p><p>	“Charlie.” John greets him back, the older man enters the apartment. Stopping right in front of John. Then a bunch of men enter the apartment with large suitcases. John never breaks eye contact with the older man.</p><p>	“You look good, and here I feared you have left this all behind.” Charlie speaks, putting his hat back on his head. The older man looks at me, bowing his head down at me, then continues walking into our house. John closes the door, walking back over to me. I try to sit up, but John puts his hand on my shoulder. I watch all of these men, pick up the guns and the bodies and place them onto plastic tarps. These men clean all the blood off the windows, walls, even the floor. Then take dead man, by dead man past John an I. Then into the large van parked in our driveway… I don’t look away as they toss the bodies into the back of the van, then follow each other outside with their blood stained equipment. John let’s go of my shoulder to walk with Charlie to the front door and stop right outside the door. John shrugs off his suit jacket, tossing it on the table by the door.</p><p>	“Will I be hearing from you anytime soon?” Charlie asks, taking off the black gloves. John looks over at me, then at Charlie.</p><p>	“Goodbye, Charlie.” John says, placing the gold coins into his hand.</p><p>	“John.” Charlie leaves John, and I watch the men close the doors to the van. John watches as they start up the van and leave. I continue watching the van until I can’t see it anymore, then I continue my watch on John. When he turns around, I can finally stare at his tie again. With all this killing, how did the tie not get messed up? There is blood splatter all over his suit and tie, but there isn’t a single crease… How is that possible? John closes the doors, and walks back over to me. When he is close to me, I look away from him completely. Staring at the floor.</p><p>	“Emma?” John finally says my name, “Look at me.” His hand reaches out to touch my face, but I flinch away from it. Dog finally moves away from my feet, walking into the rest of the house. John goes to touch me again, but I finally sit up and try to move around the chair without touching him. When he reaches out to me this time, I take a step back holding my hand up to him. “Emilia-“ John’s voice is starting to sound somewhat familiar, but at the same time… I-</p><p>I race into the kitchen, John close behind me as I reach the nearest thing to puke in. The kitchen sick- When the puking stops, I finally feel his large- bloody hand on my back, making me weakly push his arm away from me. But he continues rubbing my back as I start puking again. Then without warning, my legs give out and I fall to the floor.</p><p>	John’s tries to touch me, but I keep scooting away from him. I hold my hands out in defence, starting to sob.</p><p>	“Emma.” John’s voice is now laced with hurt and worry. I shake my head, sobbing and don’t stop scooting away from him until my back hits a hard surface. I am in a corner, and I can’t breathe. “I’m sorry.” His voice almost breaks, putting his large hand on my shoulder near my neck. Then darkness-</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>This was a fun chapter to write, John Wick in action... Let me know what you think!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. This Love</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Blood. Gunshots. Screaming.<br/>Blood. Gunshots. Screaming.<br/>Screaming. Screaming. Screaming.</p><p>I jolt awake to my own screaming. Feeling like I can’t breathe, like I am drowning. I feel two large hands on my body, and when I look over, I see John. When I make eye contact with him, I see those brown eyes I fell in love with and for a split second I thought it was all just a horrible dream… Until I saw those fresh cuts on his face.</p><p>Instantly, I rip his hands off my body, moving the covers and fall out of bed trying to get away from him. I need to get away from him. I- I need to-</p><p>“It’s okay.” John repeats over an over, but I keep scooting away from him until I am against the wall. I am frantically looking around the room, then back at him. I notice the room is completely clean, the windows are all fixed and everything is back where it was. How? John is dressed in a pair of sweats and a shirt, not the suit… John bends down to be on the floor with me and I push my body closer to the wall. Even though I know I can’t move anymore. I look down at myself for a quick second, seeing that I am still in the same outfit I dressed myself in.</p><p>“Emma, I need you to know that what you saw-” John pauses, “I never wanted you to see me like that. But you have to know that I did it to protect you and that I would never-“ John shakes his head, and I see the pure hurt on his face. Like he doesn’t even want to think of what he is about to tell me. “I would never hurt you. Ever.”</p><p>But I guess from the sight of me right now, he knows that whatever he is going to say to me will not help him. So he just sits there on the floor… With his legs crossed. John sits there and stares at me. My eyes roam around him, seeing the cut and bruises on his face, then I stop at his hands. Every time I look at his hands I feel nauseous- He must have gotten the hint that I was going to puke because he pulls the trash can from next to the bed to in front of me.</p><p>I puke the second I can- puking up whatever is left in my body.</p><p>“You still have the flu and your fever is high-“ John starts speaking, but I hold my hand up to stop him. I cough a few times, then start spitting the taste out of my mouth as much as I could. When I am down, John takes it away from me and puts it behind him. “You need to-“ I hold my hand up again, pulling my knees to my chest. I put my forehead on my knees, curling myself into a tight ball. When I peak through the crevices of my arm, John is still sitting across from me, not moving. I catch a glimpse of his busted knuckles, and I quickly close my eyes.</p><p>I don’t know how long we were like this, but when I hear the door open I jump hitting the back of my head against the wall. I swear I almost left a dent in the wall. I look over at the door and it’s the doctor.</p><p>“Mr Wick.” Doctor Kim says, bowing. Then when he see’s me, he looks over at John and nods his head. “Mrs Wick.” The doctor places his bag on the table, John get’s off the floor and stands by the door. But before the doctor walks up to me, I look from John’s legs to the doctor- “Mr Wick, I recommend-“</p><p>“Okay.” John nods his head, and closes the door behind him.</p><p>“Mrs Wick-“ Doctor Kim says calmly, but I close my eyes and shake my head. “Let’s get you up.” He reaches his hand out to me and I take it hesitantly, when I stand up he makes me sit down back on the bed. I zone out as he does his check up that I didn’t notice that he left… I overhear them speaking about my fever, and that I need to eat and that if I need to take pills in order to sleep.</p><p>Sleeping pills? Really?</p><p>“She won’t take these-“ John’s deep voice says louder but Doctor Kim doesn’t say anything. “Doc.” John finally says, handing him gold coins.<br/>“Mr Wick.” Doctor Kim bows his head and leaves.</p><p>I hear John sigh, shake the pill bottle and walk into the room. I am still sitting at the edge of the bed, I stare down at my hands noticing that I started picking at my nails again. I haven’t done this since I met John…</p><p>“Emma-“ John starts, but I shake my head and get back into bed. I roll over, looking away from him and pull the covers tightly against me. I think John finally get’s the hint as he places the pill bottom on the side table and walks to the door. “If you need me, I will be downstairs.” John waits a second, the closes the door behind him. I wait a few minutes, then decide to sit up and press my back against the headboard. I look around the room, seeing that everything is in place. I look at the side table, looking at the pill bottles on the hardwood.</p><p>I swear I saw a broken furniture last night- was that last night or this morning? I sit up, looking at the clock and it’s one in the afternoon- So it was last night… I get out of bed, going to the closet and open it. I push all the clothes aside and I finally notice the fake wall- Was I that oblivious? I let out a huff as I press the fake wall and it pops out. I move it aside and I remember the code that John dialled last night. I press the buttons, opening the door and let out a long deep breath.</p><p>I cover my mouth, taking a few steps away from the hidden safe room that I didn’t know about. It takes me a few minutes to muster up the courage, but I finally step inside the safe room. The paintings are back up, and the TV is shut off. I stand there, looking around the normal looking room until I see our wedding photo. I walk up to it, noticing that it moves. Another keypad- when I press in the same code for the door it makes a noise then all the paintings lower and reveal the arsenal of weapons. I let out another huff, feeling lightheaded and confused. I don’t know how, but I ended up sitting on the floor and continuing to stare at all of the weapons. I was too busy to look at them last night- even though I wish I would have done this instead of seeing all of those people-</p><p>“Emilia?” John rushes into the safe room, and stops to look at me. “What are you doing in here?” John asks, slowly walking up to me. I shake my head, standing up and backing up against the wall.</p><p>“I-“ I breathe, looking around at the wall of weapons and blink away the tears. I shake my head, not understanding the situation that I am in. John steps in front of me, blocking my view from the guns and I immediately squeeze my eyes shut. I feel his large hands grab my face, pulling it up to look at him. But I keep my eyes shut, refusing to look at him.</p><p>“I know you have a lot of questions.” John’s minty breath touches you face, signalling that he is only a few inches away.<br/>“Why?” I breathe, opening my eyes to finally look at him. I almost flinch as his thumb brushes my face. “I- I don’t understand. How- How did you- Why did you-” I can’t breathe, I can’t think. I force my eyes away from him. Feeling the skin next to my fingers bleeding. The skin completely ripped off. I’m having an anxiety attack and John knows this. He can see and feel it-</p><p>“Hey, hey, it’s okay.” John puts his hand on my chin, tilting my head and makes me look in his eyes again. “Shh. You’re okay. You need to breathe-“ But all I could do was let out a panicked sob. But I found myself thinking about how his eyes are so beautiful and filled with sadness. “Shh.” John says, making me let out a shaky breath. That’s when I notice John’s calm self, even though I can see that he was concerned about me.</p><p>But the second I can breathe easily, I let out another sob. John’s face is filled with concern, which made my heart ache even more. I am sliding down the wall, falling to the floor but John holds me up, pulling me into his arms.</p><p>“Baby-“ John’s voice is now a whisper. “I’m so sorry.” John hoists me up, making my arms fly around his neck. This- This right here is my John. The man who doesn’t judge me for the feelings I have. The man who- who… Killed all of those people. Somehow you manage to stop sobbing, and now you’re just standing there starting to feel numb to all of this. These strong feelings starting to turn into something else.</p><p>“Baba yaga-“ I whisper, making John tense up.</p><p>“What?” John asks, looking at me.</p><p>“Baba yaga. What- what does it mean?” I ask, making John open his mouth then shut it. “A man said it right before you stabbed him in the neck. Now- what does it mean, Johnathan?” My voice shakes, seeing the look on his face is making me want to get out of his hold. I push his arms off of me, taking a few steps away from him. John snaps back, grabbing my arm before I can get any further and stops me dead in my tracks.</p><p>“Em-“</p><p>“What does it mean?” I ask again, but John looks at the wall instead of at me. “Jonathan!” I yell, making his grip tighten.</p><p>“Boogeyman!” John yells in my face, making me jump. When he see’s me, his face changes immediately, disappointment covers his face. “I’m sorry. I’m sorry.”</p><p>I look at him, then down at his tight grip on my arm that will probably be a bruise tomorrow. John let’s me go and I take another step back.<br/>“Boogeyman?” I ask, confused. I sit down on the sofa, and watch as John walks over to the keypad. He presses the code back in, making the paintings show again. Once all of the weapons are concealed. He walks to the door, like he is signalling for us to leave but I shake my head.</p><p>“It’s a folklore about a witch that ate naughty little children.” John says, swiftly. “I am everything you ever feared incarnated. People who know of me, as I have overheard, say that I am the worst thing that could ever happen to them.” I shake my head, then I remember what I saw last night…</p><p>“That- man and the cop… they-“</p><p>“They know about me.” John adjusts himself in the doorway.</p><p>“And the doctor-“ My eyebrows raise as my eyes go wide.</p><p>“Yes.”</p><p>“So everyone knows that you’re a…” I struggle to find the words.</p><p>“Assassin.”</p><p>“An assassin?” I breathe, almost chuckling. “I can’t believe this-“ I stand up from the sofa, feeling lightheaded. “My- my husband kills people for a living.“ I whisper, and feel my body sway. But before I can hit the ground, John catches me. John grabs my face, making me look at him, but I close my eyes and welcome the darkness.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0004"><h2>4. Come Clean</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Emilia let’s John take care of her.</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>I roll over, feeling John laying next to me. I sit up to look at the clock and it is ten at night. I slept for eight hours. I look over at him, seeing him fast asleep. I take in a deep breathe, feeling my dry throat. I cough, feeling the events from two days ago finally wash over me. I pull the covers away from me, feeling like I am burning up. I am drenched in sweat and I have a somewhat appetite. Before I can move my feet off the bed, I feel John stirring awake.</p><p>“Emma?” John’s sleepy voice sends chills through my body.</p><p>“I feel like shit.” I answer honestly, wiping away the sweat on my forehead. John stands up, walking over to me. He hesitates for a second, then puts the back of his hand on my forehead.</p><p>“You’re burning up, baby.” John sighs, worried. “Take a hot shower as I make you something to eat.” John suggests and I nod my head. I am still scared to be around him, but at the same time he is my husband… Both of us hesitate as John helps me out of bed. I feel so weak to walk by myself.</p><p>John walks me to the bathroom and I finally get a glimpse of myself in the mirror. I am pale, my eyes are red and I look miserable. John moves me to the toilet so I can sit down as he starts the shower. After he checks the water, he comes over and bends down at my feet.</p><p>“Do you need my help?” John asks and I shake my head. I think I can manage to take off my own clothes. I take off my shirt slowly, but when I try to stand up to take off my shorts my body sways. “Can I help?” John asks, and I nod my head. John makes me wrap my arms around his neck and he helps me undress. When I am naked, John pulls me into his arms and holds me. His hand brushes down my hair and kisses me on the top of my head. I can’t help but rub my face in his neck, feeling him against me.</p><p>John let’s me go and helps me into the shower, I half expected him to just leave me there but I know him better than I thought. John steps into the shower, beautifully naked and helps me shower. I can’t help but stare at his face as he washes my body. He makes me hold onto him, or lean against the cold tile wall. John washes himself quickly, turning around to grab the shampoo. I put my hand up to touch his tattoo on his back, making him look over his shoulder at me.</p><p>“Fortis Fortuna Adiuvat.” I whisper, and look at the scars on his body. He told me he got them in the Marines, which I know most of that is true, but I know now the truth. John turns around, and puts the shampoo in my hair. I close my eyes as his skilful fingers rub the shampoo in my hair. I close my eyes, loving this feeling. When he stops, I practically whine but he washes the shampoo out. John goes the same thing with the conditioner, letting it stay in my hair for a bit so he can wash his own hair. He washes the conditioner out of my hair and turns off the shower. He quickly wraps a towel around his waist then wraps another towel around my body.</p><p>“Let’s get you dressed.” John picks me up bridal style, and dresses me in one of his shirts and a pair of shorts. John dresses in a pair of sweats and a plain shirt. When he is done, he comes over and helps me sit down in the bed. He pulls the covers up and puts another pillow behind my back. “I’m going to make you some food. You must be hungry.”</p><p>I nod my head, grabbing his hand before he can move. John bends down and pulls my hand up so he can kiss it.</p><p>“I will be right back.” John kisses my knuckles, and places my hand back on the bed. I give him a soft smile, knowing that he loves to take care of me. He is a very passionate man, who shows his love by doing things for others. He isn’t really a talker, her has been since I met him.</p><p>I was working at a diner in New York, John was a regular customer. He would come every night, at the same time and sit at the same table. Even then I knew he loved order and being repetitive. My coworkers said that he would never come unless I was working. Me being a single 35 year old, who hasn’t been on a date in five years was very oblivious to all of the flirting we were doing. Until a coworker pointed it out. John would come near the end of my shift, then walk me to my car every night. Then he finally asked me out on a date. It was the fanciest restaurant I have ever been to- John was the perfect gentleman. I was completely memorised by him.</p><p>John walks back into the room, with the tray. He places the tray on my lap and its of course soup. The only thing I eat when I am sick. John makes sure I drink all of the broth and two glasses of water. Once I am down, I lay my head against the headboard. John takes away the tray and places it on the dresser. When he comes back over, he sits at the edge of the bed next to me. He grabs my hands, rubbing his thumbs on the top of my hands.</p><p>“Emilia, I-“</p><p>“John, please.” I whisper, squeezing his hands.</p><p>“Let me at least explain.” John suggests and I nod my head. I know he needs to do this. So for felt like hours, he explains everything. How he was born Jardani Jovanovich in Belarus, orphaned as a child and was adopted by the Ruska Roma. They trained him to be an assassin in New York City.</p><p>John explains that he is an expert marksman, driver, and skilled in martial arts across a number of different styles. As well as hand-to-hand combat, and he was also was in the Marine Corps for years. After leaving the Ruska Roma, John joined the Tarasov Mob as one of its leaders main enforcers.</p><p>Then he tells me about Helen, his ex-wife, I know about her and honestly, I love her as much as John. We celebrate her birthday, and we incorporate her into the holidays as much as we can. We even visit her grave when John needs to or wants to. I didn’t know her but I know John loved her very much. He tells me how after Helen died of cancer, she bought him a dog named Daisy. One last gift to make sure he wasn’t alone. But some young gangster, who didn’t know who he was came out of no where- stole his car and killed Daisy.</p><p>That’s when he was consumed by rage and wanted revenge, killing the man who killed Daisy, the man’s father, and many more people. After that, he adopted Dog who was supposed to get euthanised the next day.</p><p>“John-“ I hold up my hand, making him stop talking.</p><p>“We can continue this in the morning.” John gives me a small smile, sitting up and makes me take my medication. I refuse the sleeping pills, as he knew I would, and helps me lay down. John covers me, and turns off the lamp. He lays down next to me and faces towards me.</p><p>“Please continue.” I whisper, rolling on my side and touch his beautiful tired face. Then start petting his facial hair slowly.</p><p>“Are you sure?” John asks, moving the hair off my shoulder and holds my face. I nod my head and he continues.</p><p>John talks about how the underworld, how the Continental Hotel is neutral grounds and how no one can kill anyone there. He then goes on to explain the difference between a hitman and an assassin, then says how much he can make per kill.</p><p>“That’s insane.” I say, my mouth opening in shock. “Just to kill someone?” I ask and John nods.</p><p>“Everyone who I have killed are bad people. The worst people-” John doesn’t look away from me as he says this. Like he is trying to convince me. But deep down I believe him. He doesn’t need to convince me.</p><p>“I understand.” I whisper, moving his hand from my face and kiss his fingers.</p><p>“I love you, so much Emilia.” John scoots closer to me, making me feel so loved and cared for. Something John never fails at… He pulls me into his arms, pushing my hair back and kisses me on my forehead. I end up falling asleep in his arms, my head on my chest.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>This is the first John Wick fan fiction I have ever written, so I hope I did okay. It’s kinda hard to capture him in writing. But I hope you enjoy this story!</p></blockquote></div></div>
</body>
</html>